You are getting a connection refused exception becuase all of our interfaces are encrypted over ssl so you will have to use https with port 443. The correct url for our iControl endpoint is
https://
Since you are using java, once you try this I guarantee you will get a different connection error. Take a look at the following tech article on our site that describes the issue and what you need to do to work around it.
This article illustrates how to manually install the server certificate into the client's truststore. Since this article was written, I've uploaded a command line tool that will do it automatically. You can get it in the java section of CodeShare on DevCentral.
On thing to keep in mind is that you will have to already have a truststore created before you use this app. If you don't have one, you can generate one with the jdk "keytool" commmand with the "-genkey" parameter.
Good luck, and let us know how it goes...
-Joe